I'd like to share the experience of my first Eucharistic Adoration. Yesterday, we attended our RCIA retreat at Sacred Heart Major Seminary in Detroit. It was a beautiful campus, and we had such a lovely time. We have grown in our faith alongside with fellow catechumens and candidates who are on the same journey. It was very touching to spend that extended amount if time with them, as well as our very special sponsors. At the end of our retreat, we were given the opportunity to adore, and spend time with Our Lord in the monstrance.
I feel compelled to share what I experienced while in the presence of Jesus during Adoration. After an intense morning with LOTS of [good] tears, followed by even stronger emotions during Adoration, I developed an extremely severe headache. It was one if those ones that causes you to have to lie down and go to sleep (if the pain will allow you to sleep!) in order for it to go away. It was absolutely horrible. I asked Jesus to make my pain go away. I begged. For a moment, I told myself, "If my headache doesn't go away, He isn't really present." I caught myself, and immediately felt guilty that I had 'tested' Our Lord, and lacked faith. I felt shameful. I asked Jesus to forgive me. My headache remained.
My thoughts wandered to random things for ten minutes or so, when I suddenly realized the severe pain I felt had disappeared. It was as if I had forgotten that I had the headache, for a moment. Jesus took my pain away completely, and I had not even noticed right away! While Jesus gave me the gift of relieving me from my severe pain, I was not even paying attention. That's Jesus. He was telling that He is with me, and will always love and take care of me, despite my unworthiness. He gives us ALL that opportunity. The only requirement on our part, is that we are open to His love.
I am committing myself. I commit myself to Jesus and His deep love.
"God knows the plan He has for you, a plan to give you a future and a hope." (Jeremiah 29:11)